Shortly after taking on the challenge to write a blog post every day for a year, I took on the challenge to lose weight. It wasn’t a New Year’s resolution because I don’t believe in those. I decided to do it because my weight was bothering me more every day. In the five or six years since my last weight loss effort, I gained back almost all the weight I’d lost, I stopped exercising, and I felt awful, mentally and physically.
I felt worse than awful. I felt desperate, defeated, and hopeless. I’ve had a weight problem all my life. I’ve lost upwards of 70 pounds twice. I have (slowly) run close to a hundred races, including the NYC Marathon back in 1997.
I know how to lose weight. I know how to exercise. I know how to eat healthfully. I know how much I hate being overweight. I know all this stuff and yet there’s a switch in my head that turns off and a little voice says, Nope, not gonna do it.
Period. End of story. Good night.
Except it’s not the end of the story because if I’m not actively losing weight, I’m actively gaining it. There’s no middle ground for me. And so on January 11, I dragged myself back to Weight Watchers, the only program that has worked for me. I signed up, got all my program materials, and started counting points.
That was 18 pounds ago, and although there are many pounds lying in wait (in weight?), I feel like I’ve done the hardest part. I got started.
Now that I’ve started, I have to say that Weight Watchers makes it easy to keep going. The new Points Plus program is wonderful. It’s easy, flexible and most importantly it works. I’m not getting any spokesperson $$ for this, so I won’t go on, but I will say, I’m a believer.
I’m also a believer in exercise, although you’d never know it by my actions in the last few years. To get myself kick started, I participated in a 12-week boot camp program. That was amazing. I hated every minute of it, but I loved every minute of it, too, if that makes any sense. What I liked most was the structured workout that helped show me how strong I am and how much I’m capable of.
In the midst of boot camp, I started running again. I’m training with an online program called Couch to 5K (C25K). The website says it has “helped thousands of new runners get off the couch and onto the roads, running 3 miles in just two months.”
Once again, I hate every minute of it, except the last one when I’m finished. Then I L-O-V-E it!
I know there are many miles and many pounds to go. I’m slowly learning that I won’t ever be able to “eat like a normal person.” I don’t think there is such a thing as “eat like a normal person.” We all have our quirks about food. For now that little switch in my head is staying on and the voice is quiet, but I’m learning I’m in control of that. It’s not some mystical, magical mumbo jumbo that leads to success. It’s a daily decision. Sometimes it’s a minute by minute decision. I’m hopeful that I’m learning enough now, while the going seems easy, to keep making the right choices when (if) the slog sets in.